Shoe of Comfort

Barney loves his daddy; he loves Gary. Here he is lying on Gary's shoe while Gary plays with him with a mouse toy on a string attached to a stick. Gary's shoe is a piece of solace Barney knows to be true and kind and accepting. I feed Barney and fill his water bowl and make sure he has a comfortable place to sleep but I know Barney prefers Gary's company. Some of you may remember Barney was abandoned by his previous owner and we adopted him.

One day the owner, a male, came by and Gary met him at the street. He didn't ask about Barney but we now surmise Barney was his cat. The previous owner came upon hard times and had to leave Barney. We are so thankful to have Barney in our life; so much so that we put off moving to pay off all of our bills because we just can't justify abandoning Barney one more time in his life. No, Barney can't be moved somewhere else, sometimes a person just knows these truths. Is that crazy? Perhaps. But without love and feelings what good is there to living. What good is there to living in this world.

It's taken Barney almost two years to relax and enjoy us in his home. I say his home because this was his home before we moved here. We were invaders. I couldn't pick him up and hold him till just this year. Two years to hold a cat in your arms. Barney's feelings run deep. Every day I learn just how deep they are.

Here is Barney in the insulated and cushioned cat house I built for him. It's taken Barney more than a year to feel comfortable in this house but now he does. Today he took a nap four different times in his cat house. Time heals all wounds they say; I guess that's true, even cats can recover eventually.

Every day I hope to survive the abandonment of friends and relatives. My sad feelings run deep but ever so slowly my feelings drift into the past, then into the future. Feelings slowly, slowly releasing me from past shoes of comfort and kindness. I never realized until today my hope and search has been for another shoe to rest my feelings upon, a shoe of comfort in a world divided. Now I think, I believe, I know, we are all searching for a shoe of comfort. We are all seeking a validation of our past and a hope for the future. Aren't we all seeking a commonality of humanity, a shoe of comfort.